Thursday, November 09, 2006

The World According to ME

I know what’s wrong with Kansas…it’s the typical mode of thinking that “we’ve always done it this way, so it HAS to be the right way”. They don’t know what it’s like to have choices between more than one cable company, or more than one utility company, or more than one lane to drive in…they also don’t realize that they’re being raked over the coals by every Tom, Dick and Harry that signs you up for new service anywhere…that’s why they are blissfully happy with the way they do things here.

I, on the other hand, having lived in the land of milk and honey, or at least the land of CHOICES, can see IMMEDIATELY what they need to do differently.

Does it make sense to anyone why I should pay $12 each and every month to my gas company to cover THEIR overhead?? If I use $2 of gas for the month or $200 of gas for the month, I pay $12 for overhead…what?? Last month, my gas usage was $16, and I paid $12 (that’s 75% of my total!) for OVERHEAD. Hellooo….what the heck is going on here??

Or how about the fact that there is only one cable company in town (die Cox Communcations!) and so they think it is perfectly acceptable to charge me $50 for installation AND make me buy my own cable modem AND charge me to come see why my cable doesn’t work right??

And I bet you think that your taxes pay for a public education, right? I mean, the illegals can send their kids to public schools, even…but NO, my friend sent her son to public kindergarten here in KS, and she got a bill for $100! What??

Who taught these people how to drive? They have NO idea what to do at a 4-way stop…they just sit there, and then they inch forward, but the guy across from them also inched forward, so they stop and wait and wait and wait some more until someone finally crawls through the intersection. Are you kidding me! The first one to the intersection goes first…if you get there at the same time, the person to the right goes first…c’mon, I learned this when I was 15! And don’t get me started on the fact that if you’re in the fast lane and someone behind you wants around you, YOU MOVE OVER, no matter how fast the guy behind you is going.

Oh yeah, one more thing…supposedly I’ve moved back to the land where people have family values and lean to the right…but that DOES NOT explain why we RE-elected a liberal, baby-killing, tax-hiking woman as governor of Kansas.

What is this world coming to? I think I need to create my OWN state, the state of CALIFORNIASISTER. In CASIS (for short), we will drive properly, we will not elect idiots into office, we will not charge ridiculous fees for utilities, and we will make sure we have competent hair stylists…oh yeah, and drive through coffee shops on every corner…and Sam’s Clubs that aren’t the size of a Taco Bell…and decent Mexican food…and no ice storms…and weathermen who DON’T cross their fingers for rain (what is wrong with him??). I think that’s enough to get us started…who’s moving to CASIS?

1 comment:

Angel said...

How do I apply for citizenship there? I'm so in!!!